Wake up call the hard way....

I always hate when life decides you need to learn something but doesn't give you the option of learning it the easy way. No, that would be the nice way. Instead you get to learn the lesson the hard way and get that nice, hard cold slap across the face that says hey life is too short to screw around and not appreciate what you have. Yeah it's nice to live it up but sometimes you gotta stop being immature and living it up and living the fantasy life and make something out of life. Sometimes you gotta become an adult and really start taking those risks that mean something. Last night I was talking to my friend John (different one then some people know about, this one I used to work with) and he was giving me a hard time about how if in six months I'm still working at my current job he's going to kick my ass because I need to get out of my job and he's right. I do need to stop putting it off and get a new job. I'm not happy so why keep staying there? Why suffer? He was talking to me a lot about that and just really trying to be an eye opener for me. And after last night I got an extra kick in the butt to get in gear and really start doing things about my life that I want instead of just partying and enjoying it.

I was leaving the bar when Tim called me. Now I had already known that one of our friends' sisters had been taken to the hospital and they thought she had a heart attack. Mind you the sister is my age and she does have some mental problems where her mental state makes her a little slower, she's more at the level of say a 12 year old then being 25. Anyway it just kept taking a turn for the worst with her. They were finding out that it appeared she had been out for a few hours before anyone found her. So when Tim called me he was going to the hospital and I asked him which one and decided to met him. I mean sure I had been drinking but I was sober enough to go. Hell I've gone to a police station to bail friends out before when I've been drinking...I think I can handle going to a hospital with some alcohol in me. Tim and I have a bad habit of being able to figure out things even when people don't say things. We can kind of put things together and figure things out and sometimes know when a situation is worse then what people are leading you on to believe. We all stayed there for about 3 hours, long enough for her to stabilize enough to be life flighted downtown to a better hospital where they could try to take better care of her but it wasn't looking very good. Even when Tim and I left we both said that something was worse then any of them were saying if they were that eager to move her to the other hospital. Life flight is a big deal because it means they wanna hurry up and get you to that better hospital as soon as possible. This morning I got up to a voicemail from Tim that a specialist was beinging brought in to see if she was brain dead because the blockage had caused blood to get into the brain and once again just not looking good. I called him back to see if any more word had come about. Later he called back to say she was gone. They were keeping her on life support long enough to transport her to the organ donor area but she was gone and to make it even worse...today we were all supposed to go out and celebrate her birthday. Just pisses me off the turns that life takes. And now it further throws things in my face that...I can't keep delaying things that I need to do and want to do. If I'm not happy with something in my life...I do need to do something about it. This just once again proved that life is too short to play around. Just remember that. Don't wait till tomorrow to do what you can do today. If you need to tell someone something...then do it no matter what you think might happen. Just don't wait.